My husband noted that I'd been a little moody lately. It's true, I've been feeling a bit down. It could be that it's gray and January. Summer and fall were beautiful and warm. It could be that some of the excitement of moving twice in 6 months has finally died down. But it feels like more than that. I feel like I'm stuck somehow.
We were sitting at the kitchen table after dinner. "What excites you?" he asked. "The answer may be nothing, or I don't know, that's o.k". Smarty pants! I thought. The answer is I don't know. Nothing feels exciting. I mean baby animals are always exciting. Cakes and cookies are pretty exciting. But other than that, I'm not so sure lately.
I used to be really pumped up about being healthy. I wanted to talk to people about food and exercising all the time. I don't feel that way lately. I miss the enthusiasm I felt about healthfulness. There's a void now. Although, the other night my neighbor unexpectedly told me he was going to quit smoking after 35 years. I almost hit the sky I was so pumped. Call me anytime, I told him. You're going to feel great! I exclaimed. I talked to him about quitting smoking for as long as he would allow. So, I haven't lost it completely I guess. But still, it's not quite the same.
I've been pumped up about living in the country the last couple months. But like I said, it's cold and gray right now. Is this just a simple case of the winter blues? It's a possibility, a big one, especially with the loss of interest in things that normally make me happy.
"Do something completely different Saturday, get out of your routine", he ordered. Double smarty pants, I thought. Excellent advice. But. What the hell am I going to do? Stumped again. I thought hard. Round up all the stray dogs in town and bring them to the house? Start a dog pound in the barnyard? No, not a great idea. Leave the house and go do yoga all day? But where? And is that different enough? I start every day with exercise. And I don't want to leave. That feels like running away.
Perhaps just getting out of the house at night. I've been hibernating. It gets dark so early and when it's dark I feel like I need to stay indoors. Maybe that's starting to be a bummer. I hate feeling cooped up. Makes me feel crazy. It would be good to get out of that routine. I could start taking nighttime swims at the YMCA. Yes! Then come home all tired from splashing around and sit in front of the wood stove. I could start the morning with some yoga in front of the bay window and spend the rest of my daylight outside. All day. Outside. Saturday is starting to sound pretty exciting.
We were sitting at the kitchen table after dinner. "What excites you?" he asked. "The answer may be nothing, or I don't know, that's o.k". Smarty pants! I thought. The answer is I don't know. Nothing feels exciting. I mean baby animals are always exciting. Cakes and cookies are pretty exciting. But other than that, I'm not so sure lately.
I used to be really pumped up about being healthy. I wanted to talk to people about food and exercising all the time. I don't feel that way lately. I miss the enthusiasm I felt about healthfulness. There's a void now. Although, the other night my neighbor unexpectedly told me he was going to quit smoking after 35 years. I almost hit the sky I was so pumped. Call me anytime, I told him. You're going to feel great! I exclaimed. I talked to him about quitting smoking for as long as he would allow. So, I haven't lost it completely I guess. But still, it's not quite the same.
I've been pumped up about living in the country the last couple months. But like I said, it's cold and gray right now. Is this just a simple case of the winter blues? It's a possibility, a big one, especially with the loss of interest in things that normally make me happy.
"Do something completely different Saturday, get out of your routine", he ordered. Double smarty pants, I thought. Excellent advice. But. What the hell am I going to do? Stumped again. I thought hard. Round up all the stray dogs in town and bring them to the house? Start a dog pound in the barnyard? No, not a great idea. Leave the house and go do yoga all day? But where? And is that different enough? I start every day with exercise. And I don't want to leave. That feels like running away.
Perhaps just getting out of the house at night. I've been hibernating. It gets dark so early and when it's dark I feel like I need to stay indoors. Maybe that's starting to be a bummer. I hate feeling cooped up. Makes me feel crazy. It would be good to get out of that routine. I could start taking nighttime swims at the YMCA. Yes! Then come home all tired from splashing around and sit in front of the wood stove. I could start the morning with some yoga in front of the bay window and spend the rest of my daylight outside. All day. Outside. Saturday is starting to sound pretty exciting.
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